jstwnnjmp.

"i won't lose a babe just for a guy."

how many times you repeat this sentence ehh?
3.
why?
just because of a guy.

let me ask you.
is it very easy to forget your first love?
for you maybe. for me not.
still remember that day?
you did something that is unforgivable to me.
i bet you don't.
but what happens in the end?
i was so damn freaking soft-hearted to forgive you.
and i still remember you said that sentence.
for the first time.

interact iu night.
you did something far worse than before.
i wasn't stupid to stay at the table.
staring at you.
i left. i go to a corner.
i practically cried throughout the whole event.
do you know?
no you don't.
you did not think about my feelings that time.
you broke a promise you made.
you asked me, "are you okay?"
i ignored.
cause if i said no,
i know you'll feel bad.
i was so stupid to do that.
but i did.
because you're my babe.
you then said that sentence again.
and i forgive you.

now.
you say i'm taking him away from you.
i got no freaking intention to take him back,
when i let you take him.
cause if i do,
why the hell i give him to you at the first place?
instead of keeping him to myself.
yes i admit i still have a little feelings.
but the furthest i can treat him is as my brother.
and for your damn information,
i already face the DAMN FACTS.
i make it complicated.
thats what you said.
did i make it for you?
did i do it purposely to you?
is it so damnit freaking hard to tell it to my face?!
you're so scared you hurt me.
but from what you did.
you already hurt me from the start.
you said i was the one who caused problems in both of your relationship.
then why don't you tell me to stop it?
why don't you just kill me to stop those problems
from going on?!
its a good thing you do.
cause i don't bring any good to you.

yes i'm still living in my world.
nobody understands it.
not even YOU.
i am and still will live in my stupid world.
insult me, talk behind my back,
drama in front of me,
i don't wanna give a freaking damn now.
you said you know that i still like him.
why do you still keep wondering,
that isn't it over?
that i'm loving another guy?
that i already let go of him?

and from the beginning,
you never trusted me at all.
everytime i tell you my inside feelings.
you tell your best friend.
i asked you why.
you said you trust her.
i was freaking pissed.
and whenever there's something in your mind,
i asked, cared.
but you don't let me know why.
so all these times,
i was being treated as an idiot.

i now only realize.
how stupid i was to trust a girl so much
when she don't trust me at all.
and all these years i lived,
i lived with no friends.
this is how i feel.
many of them come and go.
all they wanna know is my personal life.
my personal secrets.
then they'll leave when there's nothing else.
i feel like an idiot.
continue helping people to do things they requested.
but they don't do the same to me.
they just leave me alone.
a few, i note A FEW,
they cared for me as much as i cared for them.
but i don't wanna care about these.
they are just a tiny problem in my life.
hate me if you like.
i don't care.

BOY,
if you think i'm acting weird,
treating you the way you don't like,
or to say the way i shouldn't,
then don't ever care for me.
because if you do,
maybe you'll regret.
ignore me, avoid me,
anything you wanna do then do.
and "thanks" so much for being my brother.

and girl,
i know even after everything end,
you still will hate me for what i did.
go on.
hate me as long as you want.
for i will not trust you like how i used to.
or maybe i'll get outta your pitiful sight.
and disappear.
where no one will get to find me.
and i'll be on my own.
tell the whole world i'm such a pathetic girl,
who's trying to steal your boy from your grasp.
anyway you just achieve that mission.
for your blog already inform the world how pathetic i can go.


















i just wanna jump,
don't wanna think about tomorrow,
i just don't care tonight,
i just wanna jump,
don't wanna think about my sorrow,
let's go,
forget your problems i just wanna jump.

jump - simple plan.









p/s: bryan, i'm still considering to jump. =X
p/p/s: ignore it if you don't like it.